Tuesday, November 28, 2006


Just shy of 3 weeks, and my condo is sold. Possession date? December 9th, which means I have this upcoming weekend to pack everything up and move everything out. Probably wouldn't be so tough if it was warmer than -30 outside, but whadya gonna do.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

"Bond, James my-pecs-are-too-big-for-my-body Bond."

And a big round of applause goes out to Daniel Craig for the ugliest man-chest I've seen on the big screen in forever. Would you please put your shirt back on? You really aren't all that, despite what Judy Dench and the wimpy Brunette might think.


The new James Bond.. an attempt at re-telling the story from the beginning relied on old cliches and not-so-witty banter to fill 2.5 hours. The basic premise? How did James become the tailored-suit-wearing-martini-drinking-saucy-remark-quipping poster boy for the British operatives that we all know so well. We watch him fall for the "first" Bond Girl, who before being unmasked as the first double-crossing Bond Girl, manages to transform him from the scrappy cold hearted field agent into the man who fits the previously mentioned 007 description. In the mean time? The movie fails to delve into the character's background, nor does his motivation become clear. The relationship that Bond shares with M is filled in a bit, but even that became caustic and demeaning when they portray M as an almost motherly character who's role is to chastise Bond for his childlike qualities and urge him to grow into the "man" that is James Bond 007.

The car was sexy, but lacking any special features or toys. The spy equipment - all but non-existent. Bugs; both tracking and listening; were the extent of cool gadgets making their way onto the screen, and while I can understand why they might have been kept out of a story taking place at the beginning of Bond's career, the movie makes reference to 9-11 as an event of the past, and consequently sets itself in a time period that should have Bond overflowing with gizmos and spy paraphernalia. And finally, the story itself. Dry, difficult to follow, and barely enough to keep the action forthcoming. The result? The newest Bond suffers from so many angles, I can suggest nothing simple than to STAY AWAY.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

uh oh

I am so disturbed by the fact that Steve left my room 10 minutes ago to take a shower... and not even 1 minute later I heard him having a conversation with someone that went something like this...

... what do you think?
I don't know, smell it yourself.
Smell it?
Yes, smell it!...

EEEeeewwwwwwwwwww. Some things are just better left unsaid.

Monday, November 06, 2006

a strangely vulnerable moment in time

i'm still trying to let go of things that hurt me so badly in Japan last year. the further I drift away from that time in my life, the deeper I feel myself pulled back in. I know that by now closure is hopeless, but i'm not strong enough to move on without it.

the unanswered email broke my heart. i wish i could understand why the friendship I wanted so badly could never be.

the unreciprocated goodbye.. sadly I still wait for something. i believe in him too much to give up completely. the occasional visit to see what i'm blogging tells me there's still something there, even if he refuses to admit it.

the friendships that dissolved the day I left home.. well, they leave me feeling melancholic. there is nobody to blame, just life to be realized. some relationships can only survive face to face, and others require effort that I haven't been able to devote to them. and others again, that I know are still there, waiting until I am ready to re-embrace those people that hold a special place in my heart.


I spoke to Natasya today. Actually physically listened to her voice crossing over the thousands of miles of telephone wires. I could have sent an email, I could have waited until we came across each other on MSN. But I didn't want to wait. I needed to hear her, to speak with her, to allow myself a moment of vulnerability when all the memories from last year could come rushing back. I needed to know if I have reached the point where I can dissasociate her from all the pain I lived through last year. It is unfair of me to still hold on to it. I know that, but what can I do? If it was as easy as just "letting go", then I would, but that was something I never learnt to do. In the mean time, it eats away at my heart everytime I want to reach out to the person that holds the key to so many crossed emotions in my soul. I want to rebuild my friendship with Natasya, but I can't do that as long as I think of her as a bridge to other people in our lives. I know the time will come when that thought fades, and Natasya, I'm sorry that it is taking me so long. I just can't move forward until I find a way to do without dragging the past along for the ride.


was this even coherent? I'm so tired these days, and trying so hard to stay busy and unfocused on things I'd rather forget. wish I could say more, but sometimes there just aren't enough words...


Today's Weather Forecast (pout)

Saturday, November 04, 2006

an impending nailbiter

Well, it's done. went up to Edm with dad for one of the last times. met with my neighbor, signed papers, and on Thursday, my condo will be up on the net (& real estate boards) for sale. now we just sit back, wait & see. Wish me luck!

still haven't heard from school. hoping for the best, 'cause I'm pretty much relocating to Calgary semi-permanently now. hope Richard and I find a way to visit; it's not easy being away from my best friend for so long, but at least we've gotten to visit a bit and talk more often now that I'm at least in the same country.